Conscious eating

losing AND winning

Posted by on Aug 27, 2012 in Celebration, Community, Connections, Conscious eating, Food and Drink, Intention, Weight Watchers, Wholehearted | 1 comment

When I began my weight loss journey I never envisioned myself as a Weight Watchers employee. I was focused on me and it never occurred to me that my leaders and receptionist had once walked in my shoes. I began as a substitute receptionist at the end of 2009 and I was thrilled to be able to give back to others ready to step boldly into health and fitness. Working on a team was good for me; adapting to working for a coorporation was challenging after being an entrprenuer for more than the past decade. The passionate people I work with and the members I support made the difference and created a smooth transition and a worthwhile endeavor for me. Last year I began as a part time receptionist and was responsible for several meetings each week. Our members say I inspire them but truly they keep me accountable and on track and motivate me to excel at staying on plan and active. Working for Weight Watchers is more than a job—its a calling. A call to action I am proud to step up for.   Weigh in pods   This month we closed two meeting room locations in our town and opened a brand new full time Weight Watchers Store—we will be open seven days a week. The store model is gorgeous—filled with bright colors and innovative modern-style private weigh in pods. The corporate team elicited and implemented feedback on design and services from members and staff to make these new facilities meet our present needs fabulously with room to grow into future possibilities. Our staff member's synergy and hard work during the move and set up have been contagious not only for current members but potential or returning members. The buzz is true: we're not your grandma's Weight Watchers! We're innovative,resourceful, educated, and stand behind our slogan: Believe. Because it works. My part-time postion now includes an honored role in the events coordianting team and we're kicking off our first event in only two weeks! The national Lose For Good® campaign runs from September 2 through October 12 as you lose weight you can help Weight Watchers donate up to one million dollars to Share Our Strength® and Action Against Hunger. Nationwide Weight Watchers Stores will be hosting an Open House on Saturday, September 15th, noon-2pm to receive donations of non-perishable food items to help fight hunger—our Ocala store donations will support Interfaith Emergency Services.  If you're local I invite you to stop in and see our amazing store! We'll have prizes, a special offer, and free refreshments. Bring a friend and a few cans or boxes from your pantry and meet our awesome staff—which I am privleged to belong to. Look for a Weight Watchers Store near you and make a difference on September 15th by joining in the possibilities which are win-win for us all when we Lose for Good!...

Read More


Posted by on Jul 27, 2012 in Conscious eating, Family, Food and Drink, Learning, Moving your body, Wholehearted | 1 comment

A week before my forty-eighth birthday I removed my rose colored glasses and looked myself in the eye. My upbeat and positive attitudes are a natural extension of the way I see the world and choose to live my life. Most of the time. I met my reflection in the mirror with a sigh. My journey to self-love would not have been possible without a conscious effort to release negative habits of self-sabotage or beating up on myself. Yet, as I squinted at myself in the glare of the overhead bathroom light I admitted that some of those old habits had slipped back into my life. Sigh. Once an emotional overeater always an emotional overeater. Releasing pounds and incorporating exercise didn’t magically erase that tendency in me. There’s no cure only free will. It’s a choice I make every day. Every meal. Every hour. Every minute.  And as my commitment to myself slipped so did my decisions. They were apparent in the scale and my lethargy and apathy—I was going through the motions of fitness. That’s all. I’ve been a CrossFit athlete for a year as of April and I gave myself permission to eat more and move less because I had worked so hard and I deserved a break and my muscles were so sore I could hardly squat to sit on the couch without being a drama queen—ooooowwww! And forget getting up and using my quads or glutes until I was direly close to peeing my pants! I never combined my CrossFit workouts with healthy eating and balanced activity the rest of the week. I did the workouts. I did not quit. I am stronger. I did not gain twenty pounds because I was doing CrossFit three times a week. I did gain ten, and no they are not muscles. I’d have to grow Mr. Universe type muscles to account for a weight gain from muscle mass! A pound of muscle and a pound of fat weigh the same but muscles take up less space, a lot less space under your skin. This is why muscles make your body look toned and firm instead of jiggly. I'm stronger but I'm still jiggly! The decision I made staring at my hopeful face was that I was done with being stuck; stuck in the cycle of feeling negative and eating to feel better and feeling worse and eating some more to feel better. It. Doesn’t. Work. I was done with being stuck and choosing to move forward. Again. Yes, again. And instead of seeing the negative aspects of starting again I chose to celebrate any step forward I was willing to make to get out of the quagmire. Serendipitously the timing of my self-talk coincided with the release a week later of ActiveLink from Weight Watchers. I don’t depend entirely on external motivators to nudge or lead me back on course because internal data is more vital to me: how I feel, my happiness quota, an increased energy level, craving protein instead of carbs! But I was excited by the challenge this tool represented and intrigued to see if it tracked as lauded. (We’ve been employee guinea pigs, reporting our experiences before it becomes available to our members.) After an eight day assessment Active Link labeled me an ‘occasional athlete’ and encouraged me to move more consistently throughout my day. I don’t earn activity points only for ‘workouts’ but for all my activity combined all day by using a technology similar to that used in a Wii controller to track movement. Cool, eh? The ActiveLink graphs show my activity...

Read More

See it. Be it. Live it.

Posted by on Dec 7, 2011 in Authenticity, Challenges, Conscious eating, Creativity, Inspiration, Learning, Self worth, Wholehearted | 2 comments

For most of this year I have struggled with emotional eating, over eating, and craving comfort foods. In the beginning of my weight releasing journey I was focused on getting done with burning fat but I learned that it was a process and there was no way to do it but go through. The same with all life lessons from having a baby to losing a loved one. I had to wrap my head around the idea that once I released the excess pounds that maintaining my weight might be a challenge but I didn’t imagine it would be more challenging than my original journey. Oh my—it is. And I realize I have not listened to my wise self and I have gained rather than maintained. At 140 lbs. I heard, you’re too thin from a few people—I hadn’t heard those words since I was nine years old! In 2009 when my mom and her love of sweets moved in with us I gained five pounds and I was okay with that because others thought I was too thin. I liked how I felt at 140 but I could live with the gain. When mom was sick last Christmas and died in January—I gained five pounds in a few weeks. They stuck. Every trip I’ve taken this year I’ve gained 3-4 pounds and then struggled for what felt like forever to let them go. It's not about the number but how I feel—heavier and less energized. Since starting CrossFit I have definitely seen and felt a difference in my body (yes, besides sore muscles!) but I haven't lost weight. Yes, I built muscle. Yes, I’m stronger and have more stamina. I still have a ways to go to be toned but I’ll get there one workout at a time. But I see that I slowly gave up on all my other exercise; walking, biking, dancing, and I felt sorry for my poor sore body and didn’t I deserve a reward for all my effort? I reverted to thinking of foods as good, bad, and evil. Guess where all my comfort foods lie out of those three categories? It has taken me all year to realize I’ve been stuck in diet mentality. My Weight Watchers leader Stacey mentioned this in a meeting last week and I had an Aha! moment. I wasn’t consciously depriving myself but now I see that’s why when I broke down and binged I could disappear a half a pan of brownies. Poof! The thinking is: scarf as much as possible because it may be months before I get this again. Then came the cycle of guilt, admonishment, feeling bad about myself, which triggers a whole ‘nother emotional food-fest, followed by the question why bother exercising after eating all that!? I was discouraged. I was tired of the struggle. I’d lost my way. I'd forgotten that this journey is a process—not about getting to done. There is no done for this over eater/emotional eater. For me the first step to getting back on track is to pick myself up. I wanted something to lift my spirits and energy. I needed a vision. Once I became aware of my thinking I was on board immediately with letting go of diet brain—I know diets don’t work yet I had reverted to my comfort zone. I needed to stretch myself out of that supposed comfortable place of excess and ease and get back up. I needed to see it. Be it. Live it. Not a DIEt but a LIVEit. Isn’t it interesting that evil in reverse is LIVE? Hmmmm....

Read More

Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead

Posted by on Aug 12, 2011 in Authenticity, Challenges, Conscious eating, Healing | 0 comments

Joe’s journey to health and vitality is inspiring, engaging, and filled with laughter. His Aussie accent is easy on the ears, too. Here’s a five minute clip to entice you to watch the whole movie, Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead and get inspired to reboot your life!  (Available as DVD rental and on Netflix via streaming video) In the movie you’ll meet Phil — he is my hero! The courage that it took to call Joe and ask for help was heartrending. His commitment and perseverance to his life, his son, and his health were phenomenal. Worth the watch just to see Phil’s transformation. DH and I are looking into Breville juicers and plotting our ten day reboot. Life is...

Read More

…lost and found…

Posted by on Feb 23, 2011 in Authenticity, Challenges, Conscious eating, Current Affairs, Food and Drink, Healing, Inspiration, Moving your body, Self worth, Spirituality, Wholehearted | 11 comments

When I first created this blog in 2009 my intention was to chronicle my weight loss journey. I wanted to keep myself accountable and to inspire others to go for the dreams they thought were out of their reach. While I was mom’s caretaker for the past year I had more issues with food and exercise than I believed possible! Wasn’t I past emotional eating? Didn’t I kick that habit when I lost fifty pounds? Then why was a cramming potato chips into my mouth while watching a late night movie? Why was I eating the high fat foods that I prepared for her because she enjoyed them so much? And why was I blaming her for my eating choices!? These were questions I demanded answers to halfway through the year as the stress of my new lifestyle took its toll. Yesterday I used my tracking journal to pull out my monthly weight since Nov 2009 when I weighed in at my lowest 140.5 I’d been hovering at 143 even though my Weight Watcher’s goal was 150 (for my height 5’10” the high end is 174). Mom moved in with us Thanksgiving 2009—barely three months later I weighed 145 and stayed within two pounds either side for the year. By January 2011 I was 150 and I weighed in today at 152. Now don’t think I’m obsessed with the scale it’s a tool not a God. But I had avoided the scale because I didn’t want to know—I didn’t want to feel as though I’d failed. I do know. My clothes are tight, and I feel sluggish and less energetic and those ten to twelve pounds are heavy and bogging me down—physically and emotionally. I felt way better at 145 but I felt awesome at 140 and will shoot for releasing the first five and then set another goal for releasing the next five. My coach reminded me to use intentional language like releasing because when I say I’ve lost a certain number of pounds I may find them again! I’ve been choosing comfort foods which mean carbs and sugar. (sigh) When we’ve eaten out I’ve ordered fried foods (gasp!) and slathered real mayonnaise on my sandwich and then asked for dessert. When I’m active and exercising regularly at a calorie burning level I wouldn’t think twice about splurging on a couple of meals each month to treat myself. But when it becomes weekly and then daily it slid into a habit or a crutch. I was using those late night cookies to numb myself or console myself, or even punish myself but yanno it doesn’t really help, or at least not for long. Grief is a process. It takes as long as it takes. I won’t find ‘I feel good about me’ at the bottom of a bag or box of anything! I’ve decided I can grieve and walk; grieve and laugh; grieve and eat healthy; grieve and love; grieve and release fat; grieve and live…until I’m done. For me grieving is about letting go—not simply the past or what could have been but my regrets, guilt, sadness, loss, and I’m ready. I’m ready to choose love and happiness. I’m ready to let go of all the things that are weighing me down and float into my future self as gently as a wind blown...

Read More

The Stress Slide

Posted by on Jul 2, 2010 in Authenticity, Challenges, Connections, Conscious eating, Food and Drink, Moving your body, Self worth | 0 comments

I started gung ho with Health Coach Team this month: my goal to loose these final five pounds, increase my strength and muscle tone. First week I gained. Second week I lost what I gained. Third week I lost a half-pound. When I strained my hip I really felt down and I had to take a few days off from exercise to rest it. So there was no surprise in my fourth week I found what I’d lost! There is a powerful difference between these two mindsets of finding and losing instead of releasing—I’m ready to let it go forever! Here’s what happened: stress. During my weight loss journey my life was fairly smooth sailing even last year when Jeff was laid off I didn’t panic, I knew we’d be okay and saw it as an opportunity. When we moved mom into our home in November I had no idea what it was like to be a full time caregiver. OMG! I stress over everything, and when I’m not stressing I feel guilty—there are so many emotions at play in caring for an ailing parent. When I added the limitations and worry about my hip I hit overwhelm. Once the stress took over I slid out of my healthy habits and right back into eating emotionally and starting the vicious cycle of feeling overwhelmed, sad, tired, depressed and eating to feel better. But I didn’t feel better I felt worse….so I’d eat some more and feel lower than low. And then I stopped all my exercise routines because what’s the point I’m pitiful. You get the picture!  The key to stopping this cycle? Awareness. I saw what I was doing and knew what I needed to do. I simply had to decide using stress as an excuse was no longer serving me. Yes, it let me have a pity party but it didn’t solve my challenges, it only compounded them! As long as I am looking at my life from these perspectives: ‘I don’t deserve this’ ‘It’s not fair’ ‘Poor me,’ then that leads to unhealthy choices. When I shift into gratitude and how blessed my life is I am empowered to make choices that support my aliveness and give me the energy to face those challenges with possibility instead of negativity. This   week I have shifted and I feel happy about my choices, my productivity, and the balance I’ve created between work and play. I’m content in roles I’ve chosen as wife, mom, daughter, partner, caretaker and friend. My mantra: I release all stress in my life along with any excess weight on my body. Please share any practices you use to manage or avoid stress. I know I need all the help I can...

Read More