My Landmark Education Experience
In November my coach/client invited me to be her guest at her completion evening for an advanced Landmark Education forum. Her transformation moved and inspired me and I flew from Orlando to Atlanta that same afternoon—it was a great stretch for me!
While there I registered for a forum in Orlando but I really had no idea what I was getting into. Landmark was about transforming my life and myself. Okay, I’m game. I wanted help and relief from the place I was in with my mom; I was completely overwhelmed in our relationship and saw no resolution. (Mom is 78 and has dementia and is now recovering from a broken hip) Even so, I rescheduled twice and simply didn’t want to go. I had tons of good reasons and was shocked by my resistance to participating, thinking I didn’t need what they had to offer.
I finally committed to an August session. At the three day forum my resistance lasted through the first day and well into the second evening: I already know about living in the present, I’m authentic, I’m in integrity—he’s not talking about ME. I experienced how completely oblivious I was and closed to acknowledging that I was inauthentic and out of integrity.
I experienced the empowerment of language distinctions between change and transformation, decisions and choices, what happened and my story about what happened, the past and my occurring reality, and being a meaning making machine. The culmination of the conversations and inquiry on Sunday was the most powerful ‘Aha’ of my life!
I acknowledged that within my relationships I had adopted a fixed way of being in reaction to a real or imagined threat, as well as persistently complaining about others. The ‘payoffs’ of this way of being or ‘racket’ was to avoid responsibility and the cost was my ‘aliveness’ (love, well being, self expression). My racket with my mom was blaming her for always having to be right and ruining our relationship, which justified me in always having to be right and making her wrong. I was right. Period.
With this awareness came how invested and attached I was to my ‘rackets’ and how inauthentic I was being and how truly out of integrity I was with myself and others. I was then able to see and create the possibility of being open and loving. My transformation with my mom came when I chose being loving over being right. This empowered me to be fully present in the moment with her, racket and story free, and experience giving and receiving unconditional love. Wow! I haven’t been present to my mom’s love for me since I was a little girl!
My experience of the Landmark Forum is that there is nothing about me, my life, or those I connect with that needs fixing or changing; I am perfect whole and complete and I create the meaning in my life. With this transformation I am present to the limitless possibilities I can create for myself and my life. On the first day of the forum I would never have believed I’d be open to this, experience this, or have gotten this!
After a conversation with my twenty-something year old daughter where I apologized to her about being controlling and right and told her I was no longer fixing things in my life or hers and that my possibility with her was to be an active listener, she widened her eyes and asked, “What did they do to you!?” I said “They empowered me to transform my life!”
This bold statement is posted at every Landmark session: Anything you want for yourself or your life is available out of your participation in the Landmark Forum.
Little did I know that I would experience my investment of three and a half days and $385 dollars as being incredibly wise and intentional. Anything is possible!
I’m now participating in weekly LM breakthrough seminars where we practice using the tools of transformation I learned in the forum and have taken my experience to the next level. Plus I’ve signed up for the advanced course in September!
If you’ve experienced a LM forum I’d love to connect with you, and if you haven’t—I encourage you to go to an introduction, talk to others who’ve completed the forum, be open to possibility. The possibilities begin the moment you register, and once you’re there I’ll share these wise words that I received from a LM graduate: Stay. Stay the whole three days. You’ll thank me for telling you this. (Thanks Reed!)
After my Advanced Course
Since this post I’ve participated in the Advanced Course at Landmark
and was once again blown away by the opportunity to reinvent myself:
“Who I am is the possibility of authenticity and inspiration.”
three day weekend was focused on group dynamics from relationships to:
family, community, organizations, societies, and the world. It was
incredibly empowering and has propelled me into action to share myself
and my journey starting with my new blog Hungry For Life which was one of my What’s Next, What’s Now retreat projects!
I’d been procrastinating out of fear of being vulnerable and
transparent and have now created a new possibility of making a
difference in peoples lives by sharing myself authentically. Woohoo!
still participating in the Landmark Seminar series Breaking out of the
Box where we deal with turning breakdowns into breakthroughs, creating
our integrity list and completing incomplete communications, taking
action to get complete with our past, and living an upset free life.
I’ve been in touch with my sister-in-law; I put our friendship on hold
a couple years ago and hadn’t spoken to her in a year. She’s open to
connect again and see what new possibility we can create together! Also
on my list is to write to a childhood friend I discovered on FaceBook
and apologize for blaming her and my experience with her in high school
for my excuse for not sharing authentically and not writing. I’ll keep
you posted on the outcome.
continue to use the tools I’ve learned in unexpected and surprising
ways and have been delighted by the outcome. My transformation is a
miracle in progress! I plan to participate in a few more LM courses and
also volunteer to assist at functions and gain a new perspective on the
education. I’ve experienced that without exposure and accountability I
can revert to my past fears and negative ways of being in a snap. The
small groups I’m in keep me connected and grounded similar to the
amazing AssistU community!
Feel free to be in touch if you’d like to know more or share your LM experience. Biggest vugs ~L.